Club iSi—Where the Party Outruns the Apocalypse

If the world’s ending, you might as well dance through it.

Nobody knows who owns Club iSi—or if ownership is even a concept here. It’s Prearth’s loudest, deepest, most legally ambiguous venue, pulsing at the bottom of a crater nobody remembers forming. The music? Perfect. The floor? Mostly stable. The exit? Theoretical. The only guarantee is that the bassline syncs perfectly with incoming asteroid impacts, a feature that might be intentional but probably isn’t. Every track drop is a seismic event. Every night is either the greatest night of your life or the last one you’ll remember. Deals happen in VIP lounges that move without warning, and the bartenders don’t ask what you want—they just hand you what you deserve. Some leave richer, some leave ruined, and some... don’t technically leave at all.

The Friendly Robot Travel Agency does not track Club iSi’s shifting floors, missing patrons, or what’s happening on the bottom level. If you’re looking for structure, wear a watch. If you’re looking for answers, ask someone who hasn’t been here long enough to forget the question. Either way, good luck finding the exit.

Wishbone Cost: 

Rick’s Review:

"Was only supposed to stop in for a drink. Woke up in a VIP booth I did not pay for, wearing sunglasses I did not own, across from a dino who told me I ‘owed him big’ before disappearing into a hidden staircase I still can’t find. The music was incredible, though."

Rick’s Tee-Hee Rating: .”